the curse

You know the curse, the one where your parents, in a moment of frustration, tell you that they wish that someday you will have a child exactly like you? Well, Jeff and I were both recipients of the curse as we were growing up and the result is just about the most headstrong 6 year old you can find.

Family dinners have recently become downright unpleasant with the amount of whining and complaining about the menu. Last night was no exception. Baked fish was on the menu and baked fish is not one of Avery's favorite dishes. Jeff and I suffered through a bit of Avery's complaining, listened to her proclaim that she would never eat the fish in front of her and and snickered while she demanded that I never cook fish for dinner again. Jeff, in a hurry to get out and mow the yard, excused himself early and on his way out the door issued the command that Avery not get up from the table until she had eaten all of her fish. Since contradicting the other parent in front of the kids is not something that Jeff and I do, I had no choice but to groan inwardly and prepare for the ultimate battle of wills.

Now I would like to tell you that I had found myself in uncharted territory when it comes to battles over eating but the sad truth is that I've been here before. I have vivid memories of sitting at the kitchen table, all alone, after everything had been washed and put away and trying to swallow bits of zucchini with tomato sauce (shudder) or stalks of canned asparagus (yuck). My parents also used the kitchen timer as a weapon in their arsenal. They would set the timer for a reasonable amount of time, and if I hadn't finished my food when the timer went off, I had to eat the food for breakfast...cold.

So last night my husband cheerfully mowed the yard, oblivious to the screaming and moaning in the kitchen, and I knew what I had to do...I set the timer for 10 minutes and told Avery to eat her fish or she would be having it for breakfast. After 5 minutes, Avery asked if she could just go ahead and get up because she was not going to eat the fish. 5 minutes later Avery headed upstairs for her bath and the fish went into the fridge.

This morning I carefully explained to Avery that she needed to finish the fish before she could have anything else to eat. Then came the longest 20 minutes in history along with an Oscar caliber performance on Avery's part. She gagged and choked and cried and ultimately ate the fish, leaving just enough time to eat 2 pieces of peanut butter toast before heading out the door for school.

I am quite confident that she will never eat fish as an adult after this experience, especially given that I will never eat zucchini in tomato sauce or canned asparagus. But, I've made my point with her. I understand that there are some things that people genuinely don't like so next time I will probably try and disguise the fish a bit before I put it on her plate...

grade 1, day 1

"Mom, I had a great day! First grade is so fun!" It is such a relief to hear that Avery is starting the year on a positive note. Despite not being in the same class with her best friend, she claims to love her teacher and seems satisifed with the other friends she has in the class. I asked her what she did during the day and whether or not she had gotten to go to any of her specials classes. Avery said something about having gone to PE class just briefly before the teacher realized that she was supposed to be in Music instead. I can only imagine what it must have been like leading a bunch of clueless 6 year olds around the school trying to get them in the right place at the right time. I swear, I don't know how elementary teachers keep up with it all.

Our new morning routine worked out great. She set her alarm last night and then was up and ready to go in plenty of time this morning and I didn't even need to nag once. Day 1, under our belt!

P.S. In case you were thinking that the lighting in the picture looked a little different, that would be because the dawn was just breaking...School starts at an appalling 7:45 am!!!

happy birthday paw paw!

Yesterday we headed out to the lake to celebrate Paw Paw's 62nd birthday. It was so nice to see him feeling like himself again after his heart surgery and bout with pneumonia. Thank goodness that's all in the past! The afternoon was breezy and warm, the perfect atmosphere for relaxing on the dock and doing some fishing. Cousin Gavin even caught his first fish! Then we ate some dinner, washed it down with chocolate birthday cake and headed home early to prepare for the first day of school. No one can complain that this family doesn't do a good job of celebrating birthdays!

Rise and Shine!

In exactly 7 days, Avery enters the 1st grade. Not that I'm counting down...This year, I plan to further her independence a bit by introducing the alarm clock. I think it's time. I am going to set her alarm for 6:35 am. This should give her plenty of time to make her bed and get dressed before coming downstairs for breakfast. After breakfast, I will go back upstairs with her to fix her hair while she brushes her teeth. Then, she and Jeff head out the door at 7:25 am. I know that an alarm clock doesn't seem like a big deal, but it is. If you could have been a fly on the wall and witnessed our morning routine last year, you would understand. I had to literally follow her around from the time she got up until the time she left just to make sure that she was staying on task. The battles that ensued were no way for either of us to start our day. I am hoping that by putting the responsibility on her, that she will 1) embrace it, 2) have a more pleasant start to the day and 3) be mad at the alarm clock instead of me. Wish us luck!

The Next Big Thing

Have you ever found yourself thinking that your life is going pretty good but will be better when X happens? And if so, what is the X? Is it a raise? A new baby? The prospect of paying off a debt? Losing weight? Why does it always seem as though there is some elusive bigger and better out there that distracts us from enjoying who we are and where we are at in life?

I have been mulling over this idea for a few weeks. Let me tell you how it all started. I set out to enjoy the summer with my kids. I made lots of fun plans to enjoy swimming and playing, not to mention all 3 of their birthday parties. About a month ago I went into Hobby Lobby to buy some ribbon for Avery's birthday invitations. All 3 kids were with me and when I noticed that there were some fall decorations already out, I suggested we walk down those aisles to take a look -- a little distraction from summer. It was then I noticed that there were already at least 10 aisles devoted to Christmas decorations. It was mid-July for crying out loud!

The other thing that got me going was a conversation with Avery about what activity she might like to participate in for the upcoming school year. Did she want to take a dance class? Play soccer? Her response was that she wanted to play basketball. So, I got online to do a bit of research and found that that sign ups were already open for the fall season (again it's mid-July). I also decided to do a bit of research on the dance class that I really wanted her to take and found that the classes start on August 17.

Now, how am I supposed to enjoy the summer with my kids when the last half of the summer apparently needs to be devoted to preparations for fall? Everywhere I turn there are school supplies out, sales on jeans (it's still 100 degrees out) and fall sports starting! How can I think about going to the pool when the commercial world is telling me that I need to be planning and purchasing my Christmas decorations a full 4 months in advance?

But the sad truth is that we don't even need the commercial world to tell us that we can't be satisfied with the present. We can do it all on our own. We (and when I say "we" I mean "me") can get so hung up on whatever we think we are lacking that it spoils everything else. Do I really want to look back on my summer and see that I wasted half of it because I was so looking forward to school starting back and daydreaming about how the house will look with all of the Christmas decorations out? I am making a conscious decision to enjoy the rest of our summer, and be happy in the present. I am tossing out the idea of X and hope you will do the same!